We used to say that love is so mysterious and inexplicable. Well, yes it is an enigma! But how do we take on this kind of thing? Like I would always tell to my friends, just play it like a game. Set rules, set parameters, and just enjoy the whole thing. But there is this particular aspect of it that I would say is really controversial. This is a relationship where either of the two just broke up and the other one is so in dire need of someone. I call them the classic case of rebounder and the rebound.
Let us do the basics first, some elementary-love 101. The Rebounder is someone who just broke up with his boy/girlfriend who is seeking comfort from an opposite sex. This is a person who is day in and day out thinks of his/her subject of affection. This person is most likely does not realize that their relationship is falling apart. On the other hand, the rebound is a person who is most of the time single. A person who believes that Mr/Ms right will come to rescue him/her from loneliness. This person is usually someone close to the rebounder. It is most often than not the crying shoulder of the rebounder when things went from bad to worse. And finally, this is the person who keeps a secret altar of the rebounder in his/her room (my exaggerated way of describing a secret crush).
But the question is who plays the victim and the culprit in this scenario? I would say that the victim is the one who is more vulnerable while the culprit is someone who keeps on taking advantage.
The Rebound is always at the losing end of this kind of relationship. This person will most likely end up crying and cursing when things go back to normal for the rebounder. Let us take into account that this person is giving so much time and attention to the rebounder hoping that it will blossom to something romantic. Well, we can’t say that mr/ms. Rebound is a hypocrite for expecting so much. We can’t blame the person especially if the rebounder will call you at the middle of the night, if the rebounder always insist to see you, if the rebounder is keeping you away from your friends and trying to as if own you and your time.
Is there anything wrong in this set up? Is there anything wrong being so nice? Well it is complete bull crap! You can’t be the mother Theresa for the spoiled brat Rebounders who is selfish and insensitive!
What then will be my advice for possible rebounds? Number one rule if you want to get into this kind of bloody hell set-up, then you should be ready for a higher probability of being left behind. But I guess you don’t deserve to be left behind, so better yet set limits to how much will you allow the rebounder to occupy from your personal space. But if you are willing to play this game and play it like a pro, you should know how to mitigate the risk of pain! The absolute rule here is to never fall in love first with the Rebounder. If you fell in love first before the rebounder, then you automatically waved you right to play this damn game.